Musings for the common man
Michael Merrett
Other titles by this author:
Slipping into darkness
The F.O.G.
Klaatu’s Return
Author’s homepage:
Table of contents
Chapter One- The clock is ticking
Chapter Two-This thing called
desire
Chapter Three- Is porn really
harmful?
Chapter Four- Rise and fall of the
American labor movement
Chapter Five- Sex, drugs and more
drugs
Chapter Six- What have we become
Chapter Seven- Still ticking
Chapter Eight- Look back in order
to go forward
Chapter One – The clock is ticking
“The better we come to understand
our foibles, the better our chances of conquering them.” – M. Merrett
Can
you hear the clock ticking? No? Listen more intently. The inexorable circular progress
of its second hand is there but perhaps you haven’t yet learned how to
recognize its ominous resonance over the din of what some refer to as human
progress. I speak not of the ‘Doomsday clock’, the symbolic instrument
scientists use to count down until midnight. That time piece represents their
estimation of how long humanity has before we destroy ourselves in an exchange
of nuclear weapons. That ominous clock has been adjusted many times during the
nuclear age and is reset whenever experts feel a positive change has occurred
in global nuclear policy.
Nor
is there any reference made here in regards to that literary bastion of
apocalyptic prophecy known as the Book of Revelations. No one seems to know for
sure who actually wrote this famous widely-quoted and highly-respected section
of the Bible. It is supposed to represent Jesus’ prophecies of hypothetical
events which could lead to humanity’s ultimate demise. Its vague and ambiguous
references are so convoluted and ridiculously broad in context that for all we
know it could have been intended for use as a self-help book for lost shepherds.
“He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches. (Chapter 3:13) These are the two
olive trees and the two candlesticks standing before the God of the Earth.
(Chapter 11:4) And when they shall have finished their testimony, the beast
that ascendeth out of the bottomless pit shall make
war against them, and shall over come them and kill
them. (Chapter 11:7)”
Is it any
wonder scholars have been trying to interpret pages upon pages of similar
riddle-laced passages for centuries? With dubious levels of success I might
add.
Nostradamus
is also widely accepted as a top-tier seer of seer’s but we won’t be calling
upon his talents here either. This 16th Century ‘quatrain’ king made
numerous predictions back in the day and a few just happened to ring true
depending upon how one interprets his writings. Prophesying is an age old
occupation that remains alive and well to this very day. Jean Dixon is a well-known
20th century American psychic who gained great fame and notoriety
through her perceptive prognostications. She would start out each year by
gazing into her crystal ball, then make a few thousand
outrageous predictions of what might occur in the days ahead. If one or two
just happened to come true…bingo! She was publicly certified as the real deal.
I
do not profess to be a prophet of any kind, nor a teller of fortunes. When it
comes to human behavior however, you really don’t have to be a world-class
wizard like Merlin or Gandalf to detect what is coming down the road. The mythical
clock of which I speak is there for those with the ability to see it and it is
very difficult to change the dial on this proverbial time-piece. For anyone who
has mastered the art of correctly interpreting history’s Tarot Cards, one thing
has remained constant in the long and storied annals of Earth’s past. Every
species is expendable. None have ever proven to be immortal as we humans
sometimes like to think of ourselves. I strongly suspect that it will not be a
meteor falling from the heavens that brings about our inevitable demise as was
the case with those mighty dinosaurs millions of years ago; it will be our own
folly that does us in. The demons do not come from without, they come from
within. We and we alone, will be to blame in the event that we eventually
follow our four legged predecessors into the land of the extremely extinct.
Currently in our world, there are very powerful forces at work. I refer to them
as the PDC’s or ‘potential deadly calamities.’ They include religious
intolerance, nuclear proliferation, over population, ecological meltdown,
social decay and the mother of all destructive forces that dwells in each and
every one of us…greed. Any one of these PDC’s is capable of bringing about the
total and utter demise of humanity just as efficiently as that meteor did-in
T-Rex and Company. It is fascinating to realize that only two of these PDC’s
existed up until roughly one to two hundred years ago, those being religious
intolerance and greed. You can’t always
see our demons but they are powerfully pervasive nonetheless. Evil and
treachery are shrewd and cunning human adversaries. While one soothingly
whispers sweet little nothings in your ear like an intimate lover, the other is
sneaking up behind you and raising its ax to lop off your head.
In
the pages that follow, you will read about many intriguing issues that will
hopefully inspire you to, at least on some levels, look at the world with a
slightly different perspective. As you read on, try and remember some of the
central themes that prevail throughout. What is genuine progress and what is
not for example? Where do YOU think humanity is headed? Do any of us possess
the power to alter the current course we are on? Most important of all, focus
on honing your investigative skills when you are presented with news and events
via the media outlets currently doing business around the world. CNN, Aljazeera,
the
At the
risk of frightening off those of you who might be faint of heart, let us begin
on a somewhat lighter tone. For in truth, all hope is not lost. Not yet at
least. How would you like to engage in a truly mind-blowing experience without
even having to drop any acid or take a toke of a joint? Those are recreational
drug references for those of you ‘squeaky-clean’ types who somehow managed to
get through your teenage years without ever giving in to the temptation to
imbibe. If you did, I can say with a reasonable degree of certainty that you are
in fact a member of a very small minority that deserves nothing short of a
rousing standing ovation.
Begin
this exercise by taking a good long look at your life and the never-ending
calamities that seem to confront you each and every minute of every day. Our
lives seem so involved, so complex somehow, they include so many people and our
personal little spheres of influence seem so terribly all-important to us. Our
world seems like such an enormous entity does it not? Many of us draw up bucket-lists
of places we would like to visit and things we would like to do before we head
out for the great eternal beyond but many of us are lucky if we put so much as
a miniscule dent in that list as the years fly by.
Next,
visit a website or your local science museum and catch a glimpse of the photos
being taken by the Hubble Telescope of the deepest reaches of the universe.
Galaxies that scientists estimate are as far away as 13 billion light years
will daze you and amaze you. Now, close your eyes and try to imagine just how
small and insignificant planet Earth really is in the overall scheme of things.
It is estimated that there are literally millions of planets out there just
like ours, possibly inhabited by life forms so beyond our imagination and
comprehension it staggers the mind. When you open your eyes again, you may find
that those seemingly insurmountable issues you face really aren’t as colossal as
you thought they were. Or, you may experience absolutely nothing at all which
simply means you didn’t try hard enough. In that case, you are going to have to
go back and perform the exercise again and do it right this time.
The
frightening reality of all this is that for all our arrogance and collective
egotism, humanity’s level of understanding in regards to our true origins is
still so pitifully small. What we have managed to learn thus far has been
derived mostly as the result of our insatiable need to know. We are in fact
nosy little buggers and I suppose, like everything else associated with humans,
there is an upside to this annoying tendency. Since the dawn of time, we have
continued to ask why, how, what, when, where, and who as we gaze languidly into
the historical rear view mirror. It is for that reason that I undertook this
venture. There is so very much I still don’t understand and my hope is that the
more I question, the more I may discover. I invite you the reader to join me on
this journey of a few hundred pages or so. While the end result may not be
equivalent to the awe you experienced when you first gazed up at the Pyramid at
Giza, I can almost guarantee that you will not walk away from finishing this
‘diamond in the rough’ without at least being able to say; A) “What complete
and utter bullshit!” or hopefully B) “I’ll never look at the world the same way
again!” You might even learn something about yourself that you never even knew
before, some dark secret that your friends have all known about for years but
were afraid to tell you. So, open your eyes and more importantly your mind and
prepare yourself to embark upon a journey that could leave you breathless with
exhaustion by the time you prostrate yourself upon the sandy shores of the last
page, metaphorically speaking of course.
Let’s
start with the essentials and lay the groundwork so to speak. Kick-off-your-shoes-and-put-on-your-thinking-caps
Human Psychology 101. Skinner, Freud, Oedipus complex, Pavlov’s dog; you know
the drill. The human mind is such a remarkably fascinating enigma isn’t it? For
my entire lifetime, human beings and the unfathomable minds that we possess
have simply amazed me. Look at all the incredible things we continue to invent
as we slowly evolve our way along the universal timeline. As I look around in
awe at the speed at which humanity is advancing technologically, I can only
stand idly by and marvel at the incredible minds that are in the forefront,
feverishly spearheading our intrepid forward motion. We have a truly impressive
International Space Station currently in permanent orbit yet I would venture to
bet that few Earthly inhabitants give it more than a passing thought.
Personally, I find it humbling beyond words as to the amount of planning,
construction and implementation that is involved in such a massive and
scientifically complex project. I watch in awe as other members of my species
perform tasks that are so beyond my skill levels that I sometimes wonder if
these individuals are really from the planet Mega-geek in the Brainiac solar system. Brain surgery, quantum physics,
nanotechnology, it’s all so complex and intellectually mind boggling to your
average dweeb like yours truly. I honestly don’t know how these geniuses
accomplish these remarkable feats when I possess every bit as much brain matter
as they do, albeit mine is a bit more dormant and just a tad less exertive.
Think
about this enigma known as human progress for a moment. Sharks have been around
for millions of years but how far have they really evolved? They still spend
their entire lives swimming around the depths of the ocean sniffing for chum.
Turtles, horses, and dogs have been around for ions as well but you don’t see them building skyscrapers and suspension bridges. (Come to
think of it they aren’t building any nuclear and biological weapons either but let’s
not go too deep just yet. Is their collective lack of technological progress
merely because they have no thumbs, which is one of the unique characteristics
that separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom?
What are the biological and scientific factors that led to humanity’s current
status as the planet’s dominant species? No one really knows for sure although
elements of the scientific community claim it has something to do with brain
size to body mass relationships. Others attribute it to our development of
sweat glands which gave us the ability to outrun lesser life forms that cool
their bodies by breathing through their snouts but that topic is a bit too
odious for this early stage of discussion.
The
broad spectrum of possibilities in regards to human intellectual capacity is,
at the same time, almost humorous. While one group engages in the mind-boggling
task of mapping the genetic code, another group takes up residence in an auditorium
eager to hoot and holler for well-endowed girls to rip each other’s shirts off
on the Jerry Springer show. Intellectually speaking, we are certainly a species
of extremes.
So,
like some of you might do on occasion during commercial breaks, I sometimes
wonder where I fall into the genetic scheme of things. I like to think on the intellectual
meter-reader, I could at the very least, light up a 100 watt bulb if hard
pressed which puts me somewhere in the middle with
At
times I reassure myself that I shouldn’t be so self-deprecating. To be fair, former
President George Bush wouldn’t know the first thing about building a space
station and he was the proclaimed leader of the free world. I am willing to bet
that Microsoft founder/CEO Bill Gates would be hopelessly lost if called into
service in a hospital operating room and for that matter, billionaire investor
Warren Buffet probably doesn’t know jack about nanotechnology any more than
most folks. Sure, I remind myself, he has countless billions of dollars, but
can he pick up a pair of drumsticks and play a paradiddle
like moi? Harumph!
Brilliant
as some of my fellow bi-peds might be however, we
humans can also be pathetically naïve at times, can we not? Far too many people
don’t even know where their essential services come from. Think about it, and
this is not meant to sound the least bit condescending because I am right here
with you as we proceed forward onboard the USS
Oblivious. When we turn on a light switch in our homes, do we know where the
electricity comes from that powers it? Sure it travels
along the copper wires in our walls but do we know its source and how it is
generated? When we turn on a faucet, we are reasonably sure we will get water
but do we know where it originates or how it gets to our houses? When we turn
on our computers and access the Internet, do we know where all that incredible
information that appears on the screen comes from? Are we familiar with the
complex inner-workings of the electronic processes that cause text, videos, and
photos to magically appear on our monitors? I put this forth not to imply that
we are all hopelessly stupid. It’s just that we take so much for granted as a
society. We really do have it pretty easy in modern day
Just
imagine for a moment what it must have been like for those poor Puritans who
came here from
All of
which brings me to the first PDC in this
hopefully-not-completely-futile attempt to put a few secrets of the universe in
better perspective for that very small percentage of readers who might actually
have even less of an understanding than I do as to what makes this little
planet of ours tick. If you made it safely through that far-too-lengthy last
sentence you are off to a good start. This book doesn’t pretend to be the least
bit pretentious but it could in fact turn out to be refreshingly felicitous.
(That’s a great word isn’t it? I’ll save you a trip to your Webster’s which is
where I had to go to find it. It means lucky. It’s so scrumptious you can
almost suck it through a straw.) My central point is merely this. Most of us may
not have the intellectual wherewithal to build a rocket, the thought of me with
a surgical mask and a scalpel in my hand is enough to scare the bajeezes out of any patient and the staffing needs at my
local bowling alley are being met quite nicely although I was told I could try
out for pin-setter. However, I have managed upon close observation to get a
pretty fair grasp on what makes homo-sapiens behave the way we do. I believe I
have learned to recognize the terrible forces that threaten our very existence.
I get it, I have figured it all out and if everyone on this planet would just
pipe down and listen to me I could solve all the world’s problems without any
reliance on legalese or even bull whips. It’s so simple a farm animal could
master my methods for a happier life and a better world. My fervent hope is
that if nothing else, this book leaves you A) not too completely dazed and
confused, B) not wishing you had ever picked it up in the first place, and
hopefully C) remarkably enlightened and dare I say it, even elevated to a new
level of consciousness and ready for a one-on-one engagement with the Dali
Llama himself.
While
there are some obvious attempts at levity thrown in, the path humanity is now
traveling is no laughing matter. Only a fool would argue with the notion that
we have in fact reached a crossroad. Depending upon the decisions we make in
our immediate future, the next century or so will determine if we are to
survive as a species. It is imperative that we all accept the fact that we are
expendable, the survivability of planet Earth does not in any way, shape or
form depend upon the survivability of the human species.
You
can start by doing something that few people seem willing to do anymore in this
increasingly apathetic country of ours…and that is ASK QUESTIONS! The American
public needs to become far more discriminating. Don’t accept everything you see
on the boob tube at face value without looking at the man (or woman) behind the
curtain. You will learn in the pages ahead why we humans are not always to be
trusted. I do not watch television faithfully but on occasion I have engaged in
the time honored male practice of channel surfing and stumbled upon programs
like the Oprah Winfrey Show. I have watched (never longer than five minutes) in
total bewilderment at the female-dominated audience sitting there wide-eyed and
doting on every word the host utters. I shudder as these far-too-impressionable
worshippers eagerly swallow every word she utters without ever questioning her
authenticity, motives, and sincerity. It is easy to see how the Reverend Jim
Jones talked hundreds of weak-minded and tragically unfortunate adults to
consume cyanide-laced Kool-Aid, then administer a
lethal dose to their children in the now-infamous mass suicide at Jonestown. That
may be an extreme example but it is intended to merely drive home an important
point. We need to stop accepting everything we are told by way of the
television set and so called ‘celebrities’ as irrefutable gospel as if we were
little more than dime-store mannequins.
Oh
yes, that also most certainly applies to anything you read here-in. I encourage
you to question every word. How do you know I am telling the truth? How do you
know my facts are accurate? What are my motives? What do I have to gain? Is my
level of credibility directly tied to the size of my bank account? Should we accept
everything we are told from people like Oprah and Dr. Phil simply because they
are very wealthy?
Developing
the techniques required to more efficiently scrutinize the credibility of those
who preach to us how to live our lives on a daily basis takes practice. So,
let’s practice. Here is our first question.
How did
we humans get here? It is a question that has been haunting us for centuries. Let’s
start by going back, back in time to where it all began. Which is no easy task,
in and of itself, since no one really has a clue as to
where time begins other than vague estimates. Some Christians still believe
that God created everything in 7 days as espoused in Genesis but as we continue
in our attempts to unravel this age-old riddle through the looking glass of
modern-day science, this section of the Bible looks more and more like
primitive poppycock than scientific fact.
As
further proof of just how far apart members of our species remain in trying to
answer this question, most scientists estimate that the Earth is 4 and a half
billion years old. Yet, there are some religious zealots who insist that our
world is only 3,000 years old.
Big Bang theory?
It’s just a theory and a very shaky one at that. Some scientists claim that a ‘singularity’
showed up from out of nowhere 13+ billion years ago, exploded into an
incredibly hot combination of gas and mass, cooled, then formed the universe as
we know it. So where did this infamous singularity come from? No one has a
clue. Could it be that God put it there and caused the Big Bang to happen? Then
when you consider that the universe appears to be infinite, a concept that
further boggles our puny little human minds, it is clear as to just how
primitive we still are. Not only are we unsure as to how the universe was
formed, we can’t even figure out how humans got here. Some scientists claim
humans evolved from apes. So why are there still apes? Did a group of gorillas
make a bold decision one day to genetically branch off from the rest of the
pack while the others, being terribly fond of bananas, chose instead to stay
behind and hang out in the jungle grooming each other for bugs?
Ok, so we
didn’t do so well with that one but don’t beat yourself up over your inability
to explain how we got here. The best minds on our planet are still scratching
their balding heads over this age-old mystery. Just because they managed to map
the genetic code doesn’t mean they’re infallible. Did I tell you I had the idea
for mapping the genetic code first but they beat me to it? I was so close too
and was all the way up to page 23 of my Rand-McNally.
Let’s try
it again shall we? After all, we are humans and if history has taught us
anything, it is that we are absolute suckers for punishment. If we are going to
make a sincere effort to solve all the world’s
problems in one swell foop, (make that fell swoop) we
need to show at least a smidgen of genuine stamina. We might as well tackle the
most sensitive issue of them all and get it over with. Brace yourself you L.
Ron Hubbard neophytes.
Welcome
to PDC number one. I began this diatribe by accentuating the fact that humans
have made truly impressive advancements in the area of technology, but in just
about every other aspect of our chemical and emotional makeup, we are little
more than common grub worms. You find that analogy a bit unpalatable do you? I
bet if grub worms could speak they would voice equal indignation over being
compared favorably to humans. Nevertheless, let us talk about spirituality
shall we? Since the dawn of recorded history and beyond, humanity has been
hopelessly inebriated with religion. We feel so strongly about it that we will
resort to killing one another to prove that one god is better than another god.
More people have died carrying the banner of some deity or another into battle
than by any other reason other than natural causes. Greek gods, Roman gods,
Norse gods, the list is endless. The legacy of some of these mythical deities
still lives on in modern day pop culture. Hercules, Zeus, Odin, Thor, Apollo,
Athena, and Poseidon are just a few of the mythical giants from centuries ago
whose names can still be found in countless modern-day references. Their
mythical escapades of love and bravery live on in countless books; automobiles
bear their names (Mercury), as do household cleaning products (
To
fully understand this awe-inspiring force known as religion, it is absolutely
essential that we first accept two very important and inescapable truths. For
those of you who may be a bit squeamish, you might want to run out and buy a
bottle of Pepto-Bismol before you read further. First, God did not create
religion, humanity did. Second, all technological advancements aside, human
beings are a degenerate species. That’s right I said degenerate species!
Now, I’m thinking most if not all
of you are on your feet hurling shouts of “What did you just call me sucka!” Well, sit back down, read on and allow me to
explain.
Whether you like it or not, the
above two incontrovertible facts must be recognized and retained as you read
further, otherwise you risk falling victim to the mistaken belief that we are
somehow, dare I say it, legitimately civilized and fully enlightened. Civilized
beings don’t invent nuclear and biological weapons capable of wiping out
millions of lives with the simple push of a button. Civilized beings would not
allow societies where the privileged few live lavish, exorbitant life styles
while other less fortunate souls starve.
The sad truth is, the only thing that prevents
some people from seeing us as we really are is our own blind arrogance. For the
benefit of those obstinate souls, I offer the following evidence to further support
my claims and this is merely the tip of the iceberg in regards to previous
human debauchery.
Pick
up any history book and the dominant theme is most likely to be human conquest.
Who are the figures that jump out at you from the pages of our checkered past? Napoleon, Alexander, Attila, King Richard the Lion-hearted, Hitler,
Stalin, Julius Caesar to name just a few. Each of these shamefully
ambitious men solidified their places in history by the blood of the
unfortunate soldiers that died under the weight of their banners. Human history
has been dogged by war and the atrocities associated with it for as far back as
we can remember. It is difficult for you and me to appreciate what it must have
been like to enter a battlefield in ancient
A
quick look at the past one hundred years is all we need to come to grips with
the inescapable reality that we are in fact the most degenerate species on the
planet. It is a period in which technology has advanced at a frightening rate,
enhancing the quality of life for many people in countless ways. Technology
however, like all things associated with human advancement, is a double edged
sword. It has also given us the ability to annihilate large numbers of people with
the push of a button. Now when we go to war, we possess the ability to simply nuke
‘em if we don’t like the odds. We can kill people
from so far away we can’t even be sure of what they were doing when we killed ‘em. The vast majority of the unfortunate souls lounging
around near ground zero when that first atomic bomb was dropped on Hiroshima,
Japan were probably doing nothing more threatening than sitting around sipping
tea while youngsters played with their toys. Stop and think about it for just a
moment. In the time it takes you and I to blink our eyes, thousands of men,
women, and children died horribly at the hands of the only two atomic bombs
ever detonated over ‘live’ targets. It is nearly impossible for you and me to
imagine what that scene must have looked like immediately following the moments
of impact.
The
twentieth century was a period when we saw not one but two full-blown World
Wars. We watched in horror as Hitler tried to annihilate the Jews and expand
his real estate holdings to every corner of the globe. The Japanese military
machine raped and pillaged the unfortunate citizens of the South Pacific with
never seen before levels of barbarity and cruelty. More recently we have seen
new evidence of human atrocities in
Need
more proof? Currently in the
Pornography
is everywhere including the most heinous of forms which preys upon children.
Legalized gambling, alcohol and drugs are more prevalent than ever before in
American society. If this doesn’t all add up to qualify as major league levels
of debauchery, what does?
It
is simply impossible to come to any other conclusion after closely examining
the evidence that humanity is, in fact, supremely degenerate. Far too often we
lie, we cheat, we steal, we deceive, we have far too many sexual deviates in
our ranks, too many of us are constantly trying to
develop bigger and better ways to blow each other to smithereens. As much as it
might appear on the surface that we are becoming more civilized as we continue
to build more intricate and magnificent machines, the inescapable truth is
this. More humans died in global conflicts in the past one hundred years than
in all the previous centuries combined. Oh sure, I can hear you nay-sayers out there with your retorts that more people died in
wars over the past century simply because there are more of us around. So does
that mean as the Earth’s population continues to increase, it is acceptable to
kill more people in order to what… keep up with inflation?
Now
stop shaking uncontrollably and come down off your high horse. Take the above cold
harsh realities and put them together with the humanly-constructed foundations
that support the world’s most dominant religions. One is left to draw no other
conclusion other than this. Could it be that many religions are shall we say
dubious in origin while some are downright utter bullshit, plain and simple? I
have said it before and it bears repeating here. From what I have gathered
after close observation of human history thus far, religion is little more than
a tool used by greedy, ambitious men in an effort to exploit the masses. Since
the dawn of time, human beings have demonstrated an inherent compulsion to
worship something. At first we erected statues, golden calves and the like,
then we moved on to religious prophets and today we idolize any
Look
at the facts. Mohammed, Jesus, and Siddhartha each spawned religions that
continue to inspire hundreds of millions of followers. Each of them was a man
however. While it cannot be denied that they were truly great men in historical
terms they were still members of a degenerate species. Some will call this
unforgivable blasphemy. I call it seeing the world as it is. The above is by no
means an attempt to stain the reputations of these remarkable men but to ignore
the complex elements that caused them to have such incredible impacts on
history would be totally irresponsible.
Now,
all of the above is not to suggest that our plight is completely hopeless.
History also shows us that as a species, we have in fact demonstrated on many occasions
that we possess a strong desire to rise above our inauspicious beginnings. We
established the Peace Corps, UNICEF and the United Nations didn’t we? It is difficult to argue with the assertion however that
we have only begun to poke our collective heads above the bacteria-infested slime
that spawned us. If that is, in fact, what spawned us I might add, for in
truth, who am I to say? I leave it to you the reader to choose between these
two well-entrenched, highly sophisticated schools of scientific thought. Apes
or slime, take your pick.
God
and religion are nothing less than huge in human-related terms of influence and
consequence. Thousands of people continue to die as a result of some of those
consequences so doesn’t it make sense to question the validity of those deaths
out of respect for the victims? Shouldn’t we continue to ask questions in an
effort to prevent more casualties in the future? To understand the basic
concept of god, it might be a good idea to go back in time and examine the very
origin of the word. That makes it much easier to track the evolution of the
most powerful force that has ever existed in regards to human affairs.
The
word “god” and the concept of religion existed long before the previously
mentioned trio of Icons was even born. It is important to remember that the
vast majority of the world’s most enduring religions were founded at a time in
human history when people still thought the world was flat. They were
unsophisticated primitives rubbing sticks together to make fire. Some diehards
point at structures such as
Stop and
think about it for a moment. (I am going to ask you to stop and think a great
deal in the pages ahead so you might as well get used to it right now.)
Based on
the above, it is perfectly reasonable to question the influences that inspired
the origins of the world’s dominant religions. It is widely accepted that
prehistoric humans established a hierarchy of deities based on anything they
simply were too primitive to understand. As an example, Joey Cro-Magnon was out
playing a leisurely round of golf with Freddie Neanderthal as an approaching
thunderstorm loomed ominously overhead. Poor Joey, unaware of the dangers of
waving his club in the air after a great shot, was struck down by a bolt of lightening. Freddie freaked out and after recovering from
the shock of seeing Cousin Joey smoldering in the grass with a new hairdo, ran
off to warn his other relatives not to upset the thunder gods or they would end
up as human fricassee too.
Violent
storms resulted in the naming of numerous deities for such natural elements as
wind and rain because the primitive people of that time period knew next to
nothing about wind currents, barometric pressure, lunar phases, etc. All of
which, as you meteorological buffs no doubt are fully aware can strongly
influence extreme weather patterns.
As
time progressed and humans continued to act as humans are prone to do, ‘god’
began to take on a whole new meaning. When a caveman (or cave woman for that
matter) got out of line, we can only assume there were repercussions. After all,
just how long can any striving-to-call-itself-civilized society condone the
practice of lustful cave men sneaking up and bopping unsuspecting cave women
over the head with their clubs, then dragging them off to their caves by the
hair and having their way with them?
Fortunately,
human males have evolved intellectually and spiritually to the point where they
no longer engage in this barbaric practice nor conduct themselves like primitive
degenerates. Now they use “roofies” like
sophisticated degenerates. Why carry a cumbersome club around when you can just
reach into your pocket for any one of a slew of readily-available “date-rape”
drugs, then slip one into your lovely lady’s drink when
she is not looking? This represents a much more refined approach don’t you
think? Some sexual deviates out there might even go so far as to call this human
progress.
The punitive
measures ancient cultures employed for controlling wrong-doing could often
times bring little more than moderate results. Stoning was rather crude and long-term
service as a member of the SVC (stoning volunteer corps) could lead to serious
cases of tennis elbow. Burning suspected wrong doers at the stake frightened
the kids. Plus, it wasn’t always easy to determine who the guilty party was. Forensic
pathology was a thing of the future and cave-dwellers were literally getting
away with murder. At some point in human history, and no one is quite sure as
to the precise date, a progressive-minded primate suggested the now
universally-accepted notion that there is an after-life. He (or she) further
asserted that once we take our last breath, we are all going to have to face
the Creator and be judged by our actions while here on Earth. This highly
implausible concept turned out to be the Mother of all rumors. I can only guess
that their initial reaction to this incredible new revelation was, “Holy Moly! Somebody better build a boat-load of confessionals!”
Thus
the phrase “Instill the fear of god in them” was born and we can only assume it
became a widely accepted means by which to control social behavior. You may be
able to hide from the cave-cops but you can’t hide from the Almighty. In the
English language at least, it is no mere coincidence that the words god and
good, devil and evil are differentiated by the addition and omission of just one
letter respectively. Are you connecting the dots here? God-Devil,
good-evil. It is crystal clear that there was a definite progression
here and while we can’t be sure which terms came first, they are clearly
forever intertwined in theological lore.
Now,
as we all know, there isn’t one single shred of evidence that heaven and hell actually
exist. How could there be? The only way to find this out for sure is by dying. I
can only speak for myself here but I am in no hurry to take the eternal dirt
nap just yet. Of course there are always those hopeless zealots out there who
believe the outrageous claims by some heavily medicated delusionists
who claim to have died and come back to life. They rail on about seeing bright
lights and the flames of hell and other such preposterousness. How does one
argue with such outlandish utterings?
The
belief in the connection between how we live our lives while here on Earth and
the way in which we will be judged later has proven to be a profoundly powerful
influence on cultures throughout the centuries. In summation, it is clear that
the concept of ‘god’ and the religions that sprung from the belief in any
number of them were borne out of a primitive lack of understanding and later,
an attempt to influence behavior and keep the riff-raff in line. It is
important to proceed forward with these basic concepts in tow. The latter still
remains at the very heart of virtually every established religion that exists
today.
Oh, one
other very influential impetus that spawned a need to believe in some thing greater than ourselves was the nagging
question,” how did we get here?” To this day no one has been able to answer
that question conclusively so we chalk it up to the Almighty. One must admit it
certainly ties up any loose ends rather nicely.
So
how did these concepts evolve into today’s most dominant religions? They were
tremendously helped along by the likes of Mohamed, Jesus, and Siddhartha, the
three most influential figures in the evolution of Earthly theology as we know
it. One cannot help but be impressed with the legacy these men left behind and
the impact their lives had upon this planet’s history. So who were these men?
Some of you may be familiar with their biographies; some of you may not so here
they are. I’ll be brief however, since we have so much more to talk about as we
endeavor to redirect the course of our increasingly at-risk and highly fragile
species. No one will ever accuse us of biting off more than we can chew eh?
Chronologically
speaking, Siddhartha Gautama (Buddha) came into our humble little world first.
He was born around the year 566 BC in a region now known as
He
was born the son of a wealthy tribal chief in a group known as the Shakyas. It is told that his father attempted to shield him
from the “underside of humanity” and did not allow him to bum around or venture
far from the family palace. At the age of 29 however, Siddhartha’s curiosity
regarding how “the other half” lived got the better of him so he ventured forth
to get a taste of peasant life. What he witnessed shocked him beyond words. He
had never been exposed to death, poverty, and malfeasance. In essence, he was
hit square in the face with a mega-sized dose of Pandora’s Box syndrome. Having
led such a charmed life, something bothered him profoundly. It is something
that sets us apart from virtually every other creature on this planet, at least
to the best of our knowledge. No, not thumbs, we already covered the extra
digit thing. It is called a conscience.
How
do we know lions, tigers and bears don’t have a conscience? Good questions
since our collective understanding of what makes animal life forms tick is
still extremely limited. We can only surmise from close observation upon
witnessing their actions and the expressions on their snouts after a successful
hunt. As they devour their prey without the slightest hint of emotion we can
only assume that they don’t wrestle with serious bouts of remorse afterwards.
Animals act mostly out of pure instinct, the need to survive and procreate. It
is doubtful that they lounge around dwelling on issues of right and wrong
between kills. Once we learn to speak lion-ese I’m
sure many of these nagging questions will bee
answered to our mutual satisfaction.
Back to business. It
is apparent that Siddhartha was probably wrestling with his conscience more than
other humans of his day since after all, he is the one we remember most. Can
you name anyone else who was born in the
After that
brief period during which he set out to discover the world, he reportedly
returned to his village with a group of followers so it is clear there were
those who were eager and willing to listen to him right from the get go. He
began espousing the need to follow a lifestyle known as “the middle way”, a
compromise between unbridled greed/materialism and respecting everything that
surrounds us on an existential level. I personally find it absolutely amazing
that this man recognized the dangers to society of another PDC (pervasive greed)
2500 years ago and yet we still haven’t learned to overcome this devastating scourge
to humanity. Siddhartha is the human most associated with the word
“enlightenment”, something he reportedly achieved at one point in his life
which elevated him to a status beyond that of mere man in the eyes of his
followers.
Buddhism
is based on a doctrine referred to as “The Four Noble Truths” and they are:
1.) All human life is suffering. (Ain’t that the truth.)
2.) All suffering is caused by human desire, particularly the desire that
impermanent things be permanent.
3.) Human suffering can be ended by ending human desire.
4.) Desire can be ended by
following the "Eight-fold Noble Path": right understanding, right
thought, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right
mindfulness, and right concentration.
In
essence, anyone who achieves mastery of this doctrine and attempts to live by
its code can achieve “enlightenment”. No easy task judging by modern day
Note
the operative word contained in the ‘Four Noble Truths’. Desire,
which is the twin brother to temptation. As you read on, you will see
how incredibly pervasive these elements are in our daily lives.
Siddhartha
lived to a healthy old age and after his death, a small group of followers
known as ‘monks’ carried on his teachings. Once again however, as we will see
later with both Islam and Christianity, religion and politics rarely seem able
to avoid one another and find themselves more often than not on a collision
course. It took a political figure to elevate Siddhartha to the big stage. The
emperor
If you
happen to visit various Asian countries today, don’t be surprised to see
Buddhist monks wandering from place to place looking like they really don’t
know what they are supposed to be doing in life. They never seem like they know
exactly where they are going and they don’t appear to be in any hurry to get
there. In Buddhist culture, it is good luck to offer them food and shelter and
such gestures can even buy you favor with the ‘Big Buddha upstairs.’ All
kidding aside though, they may be a bit of an enigma but you will never see one
of them wearing any concealed explosive devices strapped to their anatomy. Suicide monks? Unthinkable. Women find
them absolutely adorable and often can’t resist the urge to run up and hug one
of ‘em.
Our next
historical giant is the man whose influence has spawned more followers than any
other. We know him as Jesus of Nazareth and to this day, more controversy
surrounds his true identity and the circumstances of his life than any other human
since the age of the dinosaurs. Western civilization even changed its calendar based
on the year he was born. We now refer to that very large part of human history
prior to his birth as B.C. (Before Christ). After he was born is recorded as
A.D. or anno domini which means ‘year of our lord.’
So, was
he really the Son of God? Did he really perform all those incredible miracles?
As usual, the key element that runs through this thread is the same one that
runs through the threads of every other religion the world over. It all comes
down to what you are willing to believe. Christians refer to God as simply
“God”, Muslims have “Allah”, Jews have “Jehovah” and the Hindus have their
“Brahman”. Which is the one true God? Christians have the highest number of
believers so it only stands to reason they must be correct, right?
Faith is
such an enormously all-encompassing and powerful virtue. It can easily consume
us and result in an overwhelming urge to enforce our beliefs upon others. It is
this unfortunate side effect that has caused more war and strife than any other
stimulus in human history. Now if we could all just learn to keep our religious
convictions to ourselves, some of us might be able to stop fretting over the
current terrorist-alert levels and get a little REM sleep.
Jesus was
by all accounts a man of profound peace. Thus his nickname
“The Prince of Peace,” which is in direct contrast to Mohammed who was reputed
to be a warrior by nature. Jesus supposedly inspired his twelve
“disciples” to write that portion of the Bible known as the “New Testament.” It
chronicles the life and teachings of this legendary man born the son of Joseph
and Mary in a manger in
The
circumstances surrounding his death have stymied scholars for centuries and
lesser minds like mine for hours on end. The legend says he was crucified, died
and was buried in a sacrificial exercise that was performed for the purpose of
forgiving our sins. Some of his over-zealous followers claim they saw him rise
from the dead and ascend into heaven, but was this genuine
fact or fanciful fiction? When we Christians think of heaven, we usually look
skyward to the great blue yonder. The centuries-old notion prevails that when
we die, after living a life hopefully worthy of redemption, our souls will rise
to the heavenly heights. Then, we will be met at the Pearly Gates by Saint
Peter who will ruthlessly interrogate us in an effort to evaluate our worthiness
to enter into Heaven and the eternal bliss that waits within. When taken as a
collective whole, this entire narrative requires the listener to be ready and
willing to swallow one heck of a whale’s tale. Did Jesus really float up into
the sky and disappear into the clouds as some of his followers claimed? If God
wanted to forgive our sins, one would think He could have come up with a far
less elaborate scheme than having Jesus wander through our world for 33 years,
then be forced to endure torture and voluntarily submit to being nailed to a
cross to die a slow painful death. What about the timing of this colossal
episode in human history? He died to forgive the sins of all humanity but does
that include the countless indiscretions that followed? Humans have committed
far more atrocities after Jesus died than they could have possibly committed
prior to his being nailed to that cross. On his best day, William Shakespeare
couldn’t concoct a yarn of this magnitude.
And what
about this most highly acclaimed book in human history, the Bible? An in-depth
evaluation of Christian history reveals incontrovertible evidence that this
most fabled of all texts has been edited, re-written and re-interpreted to suit
the whim of countless kings, popes, and other self-motivated egomaniacs. The
“King James” Bible, as one example, was a compromise version resulting from a
dispute between Puritans and the ruling bishops of the day. The means used to
record the original writings of Jesus’ disciples was so primitive that it is
difficult for anyone to know with absolute certainty exactly what they wrote,
what they meant and what they actually saw Jesus do. Did he really perform all
those incredible miracles? Without trying to come across as the least bit
disrespectful because I do genuinely admire the legacy this man left behind, could
it be that the observers of these miracles were simply too primitive to
understand what was transpiring? If we had a time machine and we could send famed
illusionist David Copperfield back to those primitive surroundings, would he
too inspire one of the world’s great religions?
What
about the Council of Nicea and the Council of
Constantinople, both of which took place in the fourth century AD? They both
represented great gatherings where the myriad of conflicting Christian factions
came together to decide which passages would be included in future versions of
the Bible and which would be omitted. It was also during these Councils that
church leaders decided that Jesus would be recognized as the true son of God
going forward. This was a time of great confusion and internal conflict, a
period during which certain members of the Catholic Church really went off the
deep end. Secret societies like Opus Day and the Priory of Sion
came into existence over whisperings of a Royal Bloodline that swirled around
Jesus’ involvement with Mary Magdalene. With all due respect to author Dan
Brown, these rumors and conspiracy theories were alive and well centuries before
he came up with the idea of crafting his highly acclaimed novel ‘The Davinci Code.”
Prior to
the television set, the Bible ranked as the most powerful control device known
to man. Religion is a very powerful drug and once it enters the blood stream,
it is nearly impossible to resist. There are actually courageous crusaders out
there who make a living de-brainwashing those who cannot regain control of
their own minds and bodily functions once they have had their heads filled with
an overdose of religious theology. The notion that some invisible being is
watching everything we do and that we will be judged in the end is powerful
stuff indeed. Especially when you throw in added enticements like irresistible
visions of heavenly bliss and the alternative: spending the rest of eternity
sweltering in the fires of hell.
Many
bible thumpers love to quote passages from this awe-inspiring book to reinforce
virtually everything they preach. They proceed under the unshakable assumption
that by quoting the Bible, it gives them an aura of infallibility found nowhere
else in the world. If you question them, you are either a devil worshipper, a
heathen, or unspeakably evil. Too many of these poor lost souls lack the will
or the intellectual capacity to question anything contained therein. This book,
completely written by primitive men with nothing more than a rudimentary
understanding of the physical world around them scientifically speaking,
contains text that to this day drives humans absolutely mad with religious
frenzy.
The
factual truth is that while some good intentions were involved, much of the
world’s religions are based on myth, legend, innuendo, superstition, conspiracy,
hocus-pocus, mumbo –jumbo, and deceit. That all adds up to a witch’s brew of
Biblical proportions. Religion has always clashed with science. When men like
Sir Isaac Newton and Charles Darwin made major breakthroughs and elevated our
understanding of our physical world, they were harshly chastised and portrayed
as demons by Christian churches.
Despite the fact that humanity has
a long-standing and clearly established history of distrustful behavior, the
Bible somehow remains above reproach. Every human being since Joey Cro-Magnon
may be capable of lying, but certainly not the twelve disciples
right? ‘Let he who is without sin cast the first stone,’ Jesus once said to an
unruly mob. Even he recognized that we are all sinners and hopeless degenerates
(on the upswing) yet his 12 disciples are somehow viewed today as superhuman pillars
of virtue able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. The night Jesus was
taken into custody, Peter himself denied that he ever knew his lord and savior
when his feet were put to the fire so to speak by the Romans. Out of pure fear,
he lied plain and simple which, to any sane person can
mean only one thing? He and the other disciples were
every bit as human as the rest of us. They had an agenda, they had motives, and
they were every bit as capable as any one of us of stretching and twisting the
truth to meet their own end. Legendary Italian statesman Niccolo
Machiavelli came along centuries later and is credited with coining the phrase,
‘the end justifies the means.” It could be easily argued however, that the
twelve disciples popularized it long before ‘Big Mach’ began wandering the
streets of
It is
clear that Jesus’ claim to fame was initially enhanced primarily through the
words of these 12 loyal followers. Which begs the question, how difficult is it
for anyone to gather a group of followers together and inspire them to do your
bidding? Have you ever heard the names Jim Jones, David Koresh, or Marshall Applewhite? One of the many differences between these three
20th-century messiah-loony’s and a pillar of virtue like Jesus is
that today, with our somewhat more advanced understanding of the scientific
world, it is far more difficult to dupe people into believing that you are
going around performing miracles and receiving communiqués directly from God.
Much of
Jesus’ legend was built upon his perceived ability to perform superhuman deeds.
He walked on water didn’t he? Or was he merely walking along a sandbar that
made it appear as though he was walking on water? He
turned water into wine? Such a feat would be child’s play for any one of a
thousand modern day magicians. He reportedly raised Lazarus from the dead. Or
did he? The accrued medical knowledge of that region up to that point was still
primitive at best. Could Lazarus have been in a coma-like state and by mere
coincidence, he regained consciousness while Jesus was in the vicinity? All of which might come across as unforgivable
blasphemy to some of you more staunch supporters out there but the implication
here is merely this. For centuries humans have been killing each other in vast
numbers over religious differences of opinion. The Crusades are centuries in
the past yet here we are in the 21st century still grappling with a
world-wide Muslim-Christian conflict that seems to have no end. Doesn’t it make sense to question the validity
of this never-ending madness?
To some
fanatical religious zealots out there, religion is a very powerful force indeed.
It possesses their minds and souls in a way that simply has no equal. They become
so strongly entrenched in their beliefs of what they have read and heard, their
minds simply shut themselves off to any opposing views and it becomes nearly
impossible to reopen them again. If you don’t completely fall in line with
their rigid set of beliefs, they immediately go on the attack and you are
either stupid or even worse yet, a devil worshipper and
card-carrying member of the Illuminati.
Collectively,
this man Jesus and his Bible amount to an incredible quagmire of galactic
proportions. Once again it all comes down to faith and one’s willingness to
believe. Personally, I don’t care if someone believes in the tooth fairy, the
Easter Bunny, Santa Clause, leprechauns, or little green men from Mars so long
as they don’t go around murdering those who might perceive their beliefs to be
a bit out of step with popular sentiment. The lasting impression that remains
with me after twelve years of parochial school teachings is that this seemingly
well-intentioned man we all know and love named Jesus must have been one
remarkable human being and someone worth emulating. Regardless if he was the
“Son of God’ or not, it is difficult to argue that what he taught and the value
system he lived by were certainly worth admiring and mimicking. I doubt that he
would approve of the actions of some of his followers subsequent to his demise
however. Since his alleged “Ascension into Heaven”, some of his more notable
supporters have done some pretty terrible deeds in his name. The Crusades for example
will remain a black mark upon the soul of Christendom until the end of
eternity. Thousands of innocent victims were ruthlessly slaughtered on both
sides of this infamous Muslim-Christian conflict and the after-shocks of this
horrible event are still being felt to this very day. Those unfortunate souls,
many of them women and children, didn’t die because God wanted them to. They
died because powerful, ambitious and clearly misguided figures of the day like
King Richard who led the Third Crusade decided they needed to be killed. It is
hard to believe that Jesus would have approved of such heinous actions.
Then
there was the Inquisition during the 15th century, a shameful period
in which Catholics of all shapes and sizes went completely bonkers. Picture an
entire army of Joe McCarthy’s running around pointing the finger at everyone
and accusing anyone they didn’t like of heresy and crimes against the church.
Torture and executions ensued along with complete and utter barbarity. With no
irreverence intended towards certain other unfortunate victims, it made the
Salem Witch Hunt look like a walk in the park. They even torched Joan of Arc,
the filthy heathens.
I have
often pondered, throughout my occasional studies of human history, what it was
that motivated these notable men (and women) who jump out at us from the pages
of our text books, Bibles, etc. Were they merely driven by the same compulsion
scientists and historians are today: the overwhelming need to know how humanity
and the universe as a whole came into existence? Were they also trying to
answer the question, why are we here, not just how did we get here? Or were
they merely ruthless, greedy and ambitious barbarians out to rape and pillage
purely for the fun of it? Those who did so under the shadow of a religious
banner were fortuitous enough to be portrayed in the history books as virtuous
martyrs. The true pessimist might sum up human history with one simple line: So
many questions, so few answers. Let us endeavor to persevere however.
Our third
Icon from religious history is definitely the most provocative of the three.
Mohammed is the self-proclaimed founder of Islamic religion. He was born in
During
his youth, Mohammed was involved in trading and caravans were very much in
vogue as the method of bringing goods to market. He must have had a very
troubled youth, having lost both his mother and father at a very young age. Mohammed
reportedly became disheartened by the false idols the local tribes worshipped
every year in their annual trip to
I don’t
know about you but I occasionally ponder what criteria God might use to
determine who He is going to appear to and who He is not. I keep reassuring
myself that I was a good doobie last year. Santa even
came to my house. How does one qualify for such an incomparable and divine
honor?
Mohammed
eventually saddled up his camel and headed off to
Mohammed probably
became a warrior out of necessity because he apparently had many detractors who
had trouble swallowing his ‘I talked to God’ spiel and set out to take his life.
He traveled to
A close
examination of history since their demise would lead most observers to conclude,
if Jesus was the Prince of Peace, Mohammed surely was the Maker of Mayhem. In
the contest for ‘most fanatical followers’ he wins hands down. Take the issue
of publicly displaying their respective images in today’s world. Likenesses of
Jesus can be found just about everywhere, heck I’m surprised no one has come up
with the idea of putting his face on a box of Wheaties.
Christians are a relatively docile and easy-going lot when it comes to this particular
subject. In the early 1970’s, world
renowned composer Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Broadway play Jesus Christ Superstar
was anything but flattering, yet it was a tremendous success at the box-office,
none of which were subsequently burned to the ground by angry
Jesus-worshippers. When ‘The Da Vinci Code’ (Dan
Brown, author) took the literary world by storm in 2004, this fictitious,
conspiracy laced yarn went so far as to suggest that Jesus actually married
Mary Magdalene, a known prostitute and that she bore him children out of
wedlock. Pretty inflammatory stuff when you consider that we are talking about
a man who many still believe was in fact, the true son of God. While some
members of the Pro-Jesus Front voiced their indignation, rather boisterously at
times, no mass book burnings took place.
Now let’s
look at the flipside. If you publicly portray images of Mohammed on the other
hand, especially in a negative light, a contract will be placed on your life. Muslim
hit squads all over the world will set out to hunt you down and kill you while
you sleep. Danish newspaper Jyliands Posten committed the unforgivable offense of publishing unflattering
cartoons of Mohammed that sparked outrage and riots throughout the Muslim world
in 2006. So much for freedom of speech and expression.
If you
even write something about Mohammed, that really seems
to get their dander up also. Just ask author Salman
Rushdie who was forced into hiding after publishing ‘The Satanic Verses’ which
contained anti-Muslim passages. Even rock singer turned Muslim convert Cat
Stevens agreed with the global Islamic call for Rushdie’s death.
So my
advice to one and all is to take great care in what you say and do in regards
to this particular prophet. Wait a minute, aren’t I writing about him right
now? Hey, all you bearded guys out there, I’m kidding! I’m just some nutty guy
flicking boogers here. Never take me seriously.
Jesus
is often referred to throughout American pop-culture in a rather fun-loving
way. I remember a Boston Bruins hockey bumper sticker during the 1970’s that
read, “Jesus saves….but Esposito scores on the rebound!” Christians didn’t take
all that much offense to it and for the most part it was seen as playful
jesting.
Crack
a joke about Mohammed to the Muslim sitting across the table from you at your
next peace treaty discussions and he is more likely to respond, “Poke fun at
the prophet again, and I’ll cut off your testicles!” It has become crystal
clear to me that some of us take this religion stuff waaaaaaaay
too seriously.
In many
ways, to you and me living here in the 21st century, the three
aforementioned god-like figures might as well be from a galaxy far, far away.
The means by which records were kept and passed down through the centuries were
so primitive it is almost impossible to sift through it all and unravel the
real truth and the motives that propelled these three men to such lofty heights.
Regardless of their authenticity however, it is clearly apparent that they were
each prepared to do something very few people are willing to do in today’s
world. They possessed the courage to question the world around them and they
were clearly willing to take on the establishment in an effort to bring about
positive change. History will continue to debate what is fact
and what is fiction in regards to their respective legacies. There are those
for example, who wisely scoff at baseless myths such as the one involving the
72 Virgins which are allegedly promised to Muslims if they are willing to die
for the cause. If it were me and this myth was in fact true, I would ask for
photos first so I could pick and choose. Absolutely no
redheads. There are others who see the Christian promise that all good doobies will go to heaven as nothing more than a human
attempt to encourage us to behave in a compassionate manner with the promise of
a reward later for our allegiance. But no discussion of such men as these
should end without acknowledging the fact that regardless of what you and I may
think or choose to believe, Siddhartha, Mohammed and Jesus deserve a tremendous
amount of respect for the impact they had upon human history. I like to think
that regardless of how shamefully their followers have chosen to conduct
themselves in the years that followed their deaths, these three legendary men
meant well and were each driven by good intentions.
Good
intentions aside however, the more one studies human history and the evolution
of religion as a whole, the more resolute one becomes with these indisputable
conclusions. Religion is a man-made commodity. There is absolutely no concrete
evidence that any human being has ever seen God, is the son of God, talked to God
or received messages directly from God. Certainly not in the
literal sense at least. That is as clear as the nose on your face. There
are those who claim to have seen God but there are some among us who claim to
have been abducted by aliens too. And what about this Elvis
guy? He’s been dead for years and everyone on the planet claims to have
seen him lately. We’re humans and you know how we lie. Our propensity for
stretching the truth is exceeded only by our boundless imaginations. We have a
slew of Holy Books such as the Bible, the Torah, and the Qur’an,
each self-conflicted in its own way. We have more religions vying for supremacy
right now as we speak than at any other point in human history and new ones
seem to sprout up every day. Not surprisingly, few of them seem to get along
with one another. Muslim Shiites are constantly sending suicide bombers to call
upon Muslim Sunnis. Muslims cannot get along with the Hindus. Christians can’t seem
to get along with anyone including themselves and have spawned more
sub-religions than Carter has liver pills. Catholics don’t like the
Protestants, which includes the Baptists, Episcopalians, Lutherans,
Evangelicals, et al. The Protestant faith for that matter was the result of the
‘Reformation’, a movement spearheaded by Martin Luther back in the middle ages.
He and his followers broke away from the long held beliefs of Catholicism. Why? Because he didn’t like
‘em that’s why. When you don’t like something
about one religion, just go start your own. We have atheism, scientology, appliantology. We have Mormons (did you know they wear
sacred undergarments? Holy boxer shorts Batman!) And speaking of Mormons, what’s up with this
polygamy thing? Who would even think of
inventing the concept of having several wives at the same time? What was he smoking?
I have enough trouble finding one woman who is willing to put up with me, let
alone ten. Why don’t we ever hear
reports about a woman having numerous husbands? We constantly see references
towards reverse discrimination in this country, what about reverse polygamy?
What would we even call such a thing? He-digamy?
The reason we never hear stories about such a scenario is simple. Women are far
too smart to fall into such a trap. They know all too well that getting
emotionally involved with just one member of the opposite sex is sufficient
enough to ensure a life of utter turmoil and misery.
In the
year 1890, Mormons supposedly abolished this primitive practice. They finally
came to the realization that there just wasn’t enough Viagra around at the time
to maintain sufficient levels of stamina to satisfy so many needy concubines.
So why is the most dominant news event as I sit here writing this in April of
2008 a story coming out of west
Back to the ticking clock and ‘too many religions.’ There is Janism, Neo-paganism,
Sikhism, African traditional religions, Chinese traditional religions, Primal
indigenous religions, all claiming to worship their personal and indisputable
‘One True God’.
Now take
a look at some of the most contested areas in the
world; Northern Ireland’s dispute with England, the Israelis vs. the
Palestinians, Pakistan vs. India, and Iran vs. Iraq, just to name a few. Each
of these bloody conflicts has religious lines drawn in the sand. No matter how
you look at it, the same common denominator remains a constant. Humans are at
religion’s core and humans are a primitive degenerate species (on the upswing)
which makes the concepts that support most organized religions the biggest scam
since Merlin’s All-Healing Magical Elixir. As such, there has never been any
shortage of, dare I say less than scrupulous opportunists ready and willing to
step forward and declare themselves ‘the chosen one’, the one true ‘Champion of
God’. Let me hear you say halleluiah brother!
I have
always harbored a particular feeling of utter contempt for those who use God as
a product put here for their retail purposes. Never before has this been so
much in evidence as it is today. I recently read an article regarding the son
of a preacher by the name of Joel Olsteen who
followed in his father’s footsteps and took up the reigns of his ministry upon
the elder Olsteen’s demise. Joel took the ministry to
a whole new level. He went to college and majored in television production so
it only stands to reason that his knowledge and depth in theological terms was
increased expo-nothingly. He did however, learn the
concept of exploiting the masses through main stream media and with that knowledge;
Osteen has achieved true celebrity status in the increasingly competitive and
highly-profitable world of what I refer to as DITSI (divinely-inspired television
solicitation incorporated.) He recently invested 100 million dollars (money
taken from the collection plate) and renovated a basketball arena in an effort
to increase the numbers of seats and the size of his flock. Make no mistake
about it good readers; flock is rather sadly the operative word here. These
poor unfortunate impressionable souls who buy into these age-old scams and fill
arenas across this planet on a daily basis ready and willing to empty their wallets
to God represent some of the most vulnerable among us. Many suffer from medical
conditions, have lost loved ones and are ripe for picking due to their
emotional state of mind.
Olsteen, the
all-too-eager-to-accept-handouts shepherd, wrote a book that is based on the
following ‘seven principles’ to a richer life. They are:
Enlarge your vision.
Develop a healthy self-image.
Discover the power of your
thoughts and words.
Let go of the past.
Find strength through adversity.
Live to give. (This one is key to all TV evangelists. Above all and in order to reach
true salvation you must be willing to give your money to the Lord, through them
of course.)
Choose to be happy.
If this
doesn’t collectively constitute the most incredibly sophomoric approach to
theology since Father Guido Sarducci, I’ll eat the cigarette-smoking
priestly comic’s hat. My personal favorite and by far the most profound is the
last little ditty. As humans we are all going to deal with any number of
normal, unavoidable events such as living long enough to see our parents pass on.
We lose friends, have our cars and homes repossessed if we are not careful, we
deal with health issues ranging anywhere from cancer to the heartbreak of psoriasis
but according to Joel, all we have to do is choose to be happy and all will be
well in the garden.
I must
confess it has been quite some time since I have encountered this level of
simplistic drivel. Now, I suppose to some out there Olsteen’s
‘Seven Pillars” represent highly intellectual stuff and in all fairness, if you
find the answers to all your problems and take comfort in such poppycock, more
power to you. If he had written such simplistic prose and didn’t invoke the
Almighty somewhere in the mix he would have probably been written off as just
another country bumpkin. To give credit where credit is due, he is wise enough
to know that by dragging God into the equation, his listeners might be
compelled to grant him considerably more latitude and maybe some longitude as
well.
After a
lifetime of enduring the likes of Jimmy Swaggert,
Reverend Ike, Benny Hinn and Jimmy Baker to name just
a few of the more notorious charlatans, I have learned to become a bit more
cautious of what seems to be a never-ending multitude of Bible-thumping TV
evangelist money-grabbers. Billy Graham was so arrogant as to respond thusly to
a reporter who questioned why he wore $1,000 suits and arrived to his ‘sermons’
via stretch-limo? “God never said I had to dress like a pauper.”
I decided
to put forth my own seven principles to a better life. Take heed, and keep your
wallets where they belong as I will not be passing around the collection plate
afterwards:
Improve your vision. Learn to spot
a god-meister when you see one.
Stop idolizing celebrities. They
are no less degenerate than you and I.
Stop living your life vicariously
through the narcissistic nitwits in
Learn from the past. If you get
fleeced once, don’t let it happen again.
Adversity is part of life. Don’t
add to it by becoming a sucker. If there is a God, he sure as hell doesn’t need
your money.
Don’t worry, be happy. (Thanks to
Bobby Mcferrin, or did Bob Marley write that one?)
Olsteen also was
featured on an episode of “Sixty Minutes”. During the entire segment, the
less-than-courageous reporter who was interviewing this latest in a long line
of TV Evangelist hucksters never bothered to pose any provocative questions,
such as: “Don’t you think that one hundred million dollars could have been
better spent actually helping those in need rather than building yet another
‘monument of self-promotion’ which does little more than accommodate additional
donors?” It is downright frightening to watch one of these gatherings. I am
amazed at the level of naivety that beams forth from the faces of those in
attendance. At the same time, my heart goes out to them. There are countless
souls who wander this planet looking for some sort of inner-peace and
salvation. Unfortunately, they oftentimes fall prey to those who make their
livings through exploitation and manipulation.
At the
risk of being banished to Hades by the likes of Benny Hinn,
most organized religions today do little more than exploit the weak-minded and
most vulnerable among us. While people like Hinn and Olsteen might find justification in such endeavors, I find
them reprehensible. Think about it for a moment. If we took all the money that
is lavished on ‘houses of worship’ around the globe and spent it on food and
medicine, there wouldn’t be any starving or sickly people desperately in need.
But then we would have no need for TV evangelist God-meisters
would we?
While
loathsome and grotesque, monetary exploitation is by no means the most
dangerous aspect surrounding this intriguing mythical force that has been
holding humanity in its sway for centuries. The real danger comes from those
who take their religious beliefs to a militant level and it is those forces who
do have the will and the means to bring total and utter calamity to our entire
species. As we speak, the number of religious fanatics continues to grow and
their efforts to destabilize the governments of the world are intensifying.
Now, pay very
close attention to what I am about to say. This is very, very important. All of
the above is not meant as an attempt to shatter anyone’s belief in God. I may
have been born at night, but I wasn’t born last night. I am fully aware that
anyone foolish enough to go around this particular planet dissing
God is off his rocker. The God Ninjas will break out their daggers and hunt you
down like a dog. Therefore, before you assassins
head out into the cold, dark night with the intent of fragging
my butt, I reiterate the following for all to hear. I believe in God and will
continue to do so until someone, anyone can prove to my personal satisfaction
exactly how we puny humans got here. Because the irrefutable truth of the
matter is, no one has ever been able to explain it conclusively. Atheists think
they have it all figured out when in fact they are nothing more than clueless,
odious, malcontents who have absolutely nothing to add to this intellectual
discussion. The purpose of this text thus far is to hopefully inspire you the
reader to question the world around you. I honestly believe that if you do even
a minimal amount of research, then apply even the
smallest degree of common sense, you will come away feeling the same way I do.
God is good, religion is highly questionable. That is the humble message I am
putting forth merely in the hope that some will at least think about it.
Wrestle yourself free of all the religious notions that you were force-fed
during your formative years, sift through all the pre-conceived notions you
have accrued since adolescence and just think about it. Then, after doing so, if
you want to believe in what Jesus espoused, do it peacefully. There are scant
few humans to look back on that are more worthy of our devotion than he is. If
you want to follow the teachings of Mohammed, once again by all means do so. Is
there any way that path can be traveled without the explosive vests though?
Why
question any of this, some might ask. Humans didn’t arrive at this point in our
existence without constantly questioning previously established concepts. Doing
so helps us grow and expand our wisdom and knowledge. The day we stop doing
this is the day they should shovel the proverbial dirt over us all.
This
brings us to yet another one of the central monumentally awe-inspiring and
universally thought-provoking themes of this entire text. I bet you were
beginning to think there wasn’t any point to it whatsoever. Don’t be cruel.
Here is a question for you. Have you ever wondered to yourself, what would you
list as the most powerful of human motivations upon close inspection of
homo-sapient behavior thus far? What are the unseen forces that are driving the
aforementioned clock to tick down towards our eventual undoing?
My answer
would be… (drum roll please) Temptation,
Stimulation, and Exploitation. ‘So what, big deal!’ you say. Please
reserve final judgment until I am well out of earshot if you don’t mind. This seemingly
insignificant revelation has a direct and far greater impact on just about
everything that happens on planet Earth than you could possibly imagine. I will
prove this to you beyond any shadow of a doubt in the fascinating text that
follows. You are about to discover that these three all-powerful elements are
forever intertwined throughout the delicate fabric of humanity. As you will
see, these three critical elements have dominated human affairs since we first
learned to climb the nearest tree at the sight of an oncoming T-Rex. They
remain every bit as dominant today as we reach for the cosmos and beyond. This little
tidbit of information might not, at least on the surface, sound like it carries
a tremendous amount of weight in and of itself, but you will see in the pages
that follow that almost everything we do can be summed up with these three words.
You will also see how they are used against us by external forces in their
never-ending efforts to both influence our thinking and control our behavior. So
trust the great and powerful Oz, don’t touch that dial, stay
tuned for this is absolutely must-see TV.
(You’re
still here? Wow, subliminal messages really do work.)
What?
What’s that you say? I thought I heard some rebellious rabble-rouser out there
ask; “Why write a book with a central theme that appears to imply that we are
all nothing more than a bunch of hopeless degenerates (on the upswing) whose
only purpose in life seems to be to royally screw one another?”
Well
pilgrim, that is a good question and one that I actually have an answer for.
You can rest assured that even if I didn’t have the answer, I would just make
one up. After all, we are professionals. (Hunter Thompson, God rest his soul.)
Without
painting too broad a stroke here, why do any of us express or exchange our
thoughts and ideas for that matter? In essence that is what this book
represents; a humble expression of ideas that I willingly accept may or may not
be of use to everyone. We express them as part of our never-ending search for
knowledge and understanding in the hope that someday, it will elevate us and
further distance us from our primitive beginnings.
There is
always the chance that something you read herein may inspire you to have
thoughts and ideas of your own. What you are doing right here and now is
exactly the way it has worked with us humans since we first learned to
communicate with one another by rhythmically beating on logs with clubs. Our
communication skills have come a long way since then and have advanced to the
point where our SETI program (Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence)
routinely sends radio signals to the farthest reaches of space hoping some
alien life forms will receive them and answer back. If they are out there and
they know what is good for them, they will steer clear of ‘the third planet’,
at least until we move beyond this suicide bomber thing.
It is the
never-ending progression of exchanging thoughts and ideas that has led us to
where we are today. Hopefully you will find the following at least mildly interesting
and it may even inspire you to go forth and write your own book and move the
debate forward even further. In the words of Lex
Luther, “One man can read War and Peace and learn nothing while another man can
read the back of a match book cover and unlock the secrets of the universe.”
Which of those people might you be?
I will
refer to human beings many times in this text as degenerates. I do so however,
without the slightest bit of malice or ill-intent and on each occasion,
understand that in no way do I exclude myself from this, what some might find, distasteful reference. So above all, do not take it
personal as it is certainly not meant to be. The word is merely used to rattle
our collective conscience. It is a simple attempt to remind us that we should
all strive to live up to the highest possible standards and up until now, we
have not always achieved that lofty objective. I further use the word
degenerate as a buffer against another prevailing and powerful scourge that we
must accept as part of our emotional makeup. That word dear friends is
arrogance.
Knowing
and understanding who we are will hopefully help us become a better species in
the years to come. In order to do that we have to lower our defenses and
recognize where we are at this point in our evolution. So take everything you
read herein with a grapefruit-sized grain of salt just as you would if you were
immersed in any other piece of literature. Being able to poke fun at ourselves
helps to keep us grounded and somewhat more introspective. And with that I will
continue this leisurely lesson.
Who am I
to bash human beings and refer to them as arrogant, some might ask? If you
share in this assertion I scoff at thee. I know these cretins; I am one of
them. I have lived among them all my life and have learned to recognize their
wretched ways. We humans think we are more important than any other species on
the planet. We have done nothing but brutalize and hunt down every other
species on Earth since we first learned how to throw rocks. Look at the
headlines even in today’s world.
On each
occasion when yet another brightly-tanned surfer heads out to catch ‘the
perfect wave’ off the coast of Maui, then gets munched on by a great white
shark when the surfer foolishly paddles into the domain of this legendary
predator, how do far-too-many humans react? They scream ‘Kill all sharks!’ and
head for their spear guns. During the past thirty years or so since the airing
of the Hollywood mega-hit movie “Jaws”, humans have hunted several species of
sharks to near extinction, ignoring the fact that they play a vital role in the
nautical nature and ecological health of the world’s oceans.
When
yet another naturalist/photographer heads off to the far reaches of Alaska to
take some up close and personal photos of grizzly bears in the wild, he
underestimates the speed at which these eight to nine foot fur balls can jog.
Being a typical overweight and out of shape American, he looses
the race, then gets munched on by the hungry grizzly who is merely conducting himself
like any other ravenous animal would in
the wild. So how do some observers react? With a shout of kill all grizzlies!
We
shamefully hunt many animals for their furs so that filthy rich husbands can
throw them over the backs of their grotesquely spoiled wives. For centuries,
humans have hunted down elephants and rhinos and killed them unmercifully for
their tusks which bring big money on the black market. Then these murderous
butchers leave their enormous carcasses to rot in the mid-day sun. We nearly
drove the befuddled buffalo into extinction which was no easy task since there
were gazillions of them around when that North American safari began. The
number of species we have driven into extinction grows larger every year. Don’t
they have just as much right to live on this planet as we do?
It
is safe to say that if a pint of blood was drawn from planet Earth,
figuratively speaking of course, then tested for
levels of arrogance, human beings would shake out at the very top of the
evolutionary chart. We place a higher importance upon ourselves than all other
creatures combined. We’re so appallingly arrogant we even make each other ill
whenever we travel from one country to another. Anyone who visited the
Understanding
ourselves, as the opening line of this book boldly states, is as vitally
important as any other pursuit in which humanity currently finds itself engaged.
Let us continue to be willing to recognize our weaknesses and not merely our
strengths as we proceed. If we have any hope at all of removing the battery
from this tell-tale clock that continues to tick down towards the hour of our
doom, we simply have to be willing to open wide our eyes and see the world as
it really is. Anyone not willing to check their ego at the door simply will not
be allowed in the pool. And with that, let’s go swimming.
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